The holidays are a time of tradition. Most of us have special traditions with our families or loved one during the holidays, such as cooking a special meal or going around the table to express our gratitude. This is why the first holiday season after a loved one has passed can be extremely difficult.

When we think of taking a break, we usually think of unhealthy couples going back and forth not being able to commit or stay broken up. However, that does not have to be the case! There are many benefits of taking a break, as long as you and your partner are aligned with the goals and expectations of the break.

Did you grow up in a family where there was constant fighting, the absence of any emotion, or a combination of both? Did you grow up with plenty of examples of how relationships shouldn’t be? This may leave you concerned about how the dysfunction in your family impacts your ability to have healthy relationships of your own. At Authentic Connections Therapy and Wellness our skilled team specializes in understanding these aspects of relationships and is here to help.

Many relationships fail because of the lack of intimacy in a relationship. The most detrimental thing you can do in a relationship is to become roommates and strangers. It's easy for life to get in the way and the relationship to take a back seat. As a relationship therapist at Authentic Connections Therapy and Wellness, I have seen this happen time and time again.

An avoidant attachment style is characterized by a person who has a negative view of others and a positive view of themselves. Typically, this style develops when people have had more absent caregivers and have not had their attachment needs to be met. Due to not being able to depend on others to get their needs met, they may have difficulty opening up and trusting others.

Anxious attachment is one of four attachment styles that are thought to develop in our childhood and continued through our adulthood. These are based on patterns of behaviors that people have in relationships with others.

An anxious attachment style is characterized by a person who has a negative view of themselves and a positive view of others. Typically, this style develops when people have had their needs met inconsistently. Due to the inconsistency, they may worry about their needs being met in the future or if they are loveable enough to have these needs met.

The term “narcissist” is thrown around often, especially for people who have high self-esteem, love to talk about themselves, and are proud of who they are. However, people with a narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) are often those who have low self-esteem and need to be admired and complimented consistently, don’t have empathy for others, and have a hard time accepting criticism.

In the modern dating world, the term breadcrumbed means to be given just enough attention to keep you interested but never being fully invested. Typically, you go on a couple dates with a person and then they seem to be busy or cancel dates at the last minute. You question if they are interested and feel confused because on the dates they seem “so into you,” but once they are no longer around you, they are distant and difficult to get in contact with. Usually, right when you are about to write them off, they will text you something like “Hey! It’s been a while, lets meet up soon!” At this point you start to question yourself, “was I expecting too much,” “did I overreact,” “maybe they were truly busy?” You give it another shot and after trying to figure out what they mean by “soon” you go on another date with them and have a blast. The cycle then repeats.

Research studies show time and time again that healthy relationships are a key factor in overall life happiness. So, what makes for happy healthy relationships? There is a lot of bad information out there of what this type of relationship looks like. Social media and romcoms would have us believe that strong chemistry and a great couple selfie in Greece is the recipe for a lifetime of happiness. While these may be #coupelgoals they are not the most important aspects of a relationship.

Premarital or pre-commitment counseling is an essential part of a happy healthy long-term relationship. It has been shown to lessen rates of divorce by 30%! If you think premarital counseling may be a good fit for you and your partner, the next question you may ask yourself is when should we start? Let’s dive into the benefits of starting at different points in your relationship!

The past few years may have felt like a marathon of relationship challenges! The thought of divorce or taking a break has commonly been discussed. This may bring on feelings of crippling grief and like your world is ending. You are not alone in feeling this and there are several reasons why this is so devastating.

Many of us are ready for the world to open back up, because we’re on the hunt for the golden egg - love. During the pandemic, we’ve done a lot of Netflix watching, snacking and board games, but we’ve also done some self-reflection, improvement and care. It’s important that, as we start to look seriously again for relationships, we recognize how the roles we’ve played in our pasts can show up in our romantic relationships.