Being in a long-term relationship with an avoidantly attached partner can feel like standing outside a locked door, waiting for an invitation inside that never quite comes.

People who lean more avoidant aren’t necessarily incapable of love — they often care deeply — but they struggle with emotional closeness, vulnerability, and interdependence. Due to early childhood experiences, they have learned it is safer to only rely on themselves, to downregulate their emotions (often suppressing them), and to self-soothe independently.

Over time, this can leave their partner feeling lonely, confused, and questioning whether staying is sustainable.

If you’ve been in a long-term relationship with an avoidant partner, you’ve likely wrestled with some of the following questions and struggles.

about a stressful day at work. You hate seeing them like this. So, you jump in:

"Why don’t you just talk to your boss about it?"
"You should try waking up earlier—maybe that would help."
"Have you tried meditation? I read it really helps with stress."

You are somewhat surprised when they respond with frustration. Maybe they even snap back with, "I don’t need you to fix it!" And now you feel defensive. 

So, what’s happening here? And why does this dynamic feel so familiar?

Communication is Key: Navigating Change Together

• Why it matters: Transitioning into marriage often involves learning how to communicate more openly and effectively. It’s about being vulnerable, expressing needs, and listening actively.

• Tips:

  • Create a habit of checking in with each other regularly about your relationship.

  • Use “I” statements instead of “You” statements to express feelings without sounding accusatory.

  • Learn how to argue constructively—disagreeing is normal, but how you handle it can strengthen the relationship.

Whether one or both partners identify as neurodivergent, managing everyday tasks can sometimes feel overwhelming. Are you struggling to navigate household chores together? You’re not alone—many couples face similar challenges. From varying processing styles to communication preferences, these differences can impact your relationship dynamics. But with the right strategies, you can transform these obstacles into opportunities for growth and collaboration. Let’s explore how to create a more harmonious home together!

In today’s world, love is a powerful force that transcends barriers—whether they are cultural, geographic, or even racial. Interracial dating, where individuals from different racial or ethnic backgrounds form romantic relationships, is becoming more common and accepted. While it has come a long way in terms of social acceptance, it’s important to understand the beauty, challenges, and depth of interracial relationships. This post will explore the positive aspects of interracial dating and provide insights on how we can embrace these relationships with respect and understanding.

In today’s interconnected world, multicultural relationships are becoming increasingly common. Couples from diverse backgrounds bring a wealth of traditions, values, and experiences to their relationships. This diversity can be a source of strength, fostering creativity and understanding as partners learn from one another. However, these relationships can also come with unique challenges. Drawing from my personal experiences and professional insights, here are some thoughts on how couples can navigate the complexities of cultural differences.

In the journey of relationships, there are moments when couples find themselves standing at a crossroads. They may be unsure whether to work on their issues or to part ways. This uncertainty can be deeply distressing, and traditional couples therapy may not always be the best fit for addressing such pivotal questions. Enter Discernment Counseling—a specialized approach designed to help couples navigate these crucial junctures with clarity and intention.

In the wise words of relationship expert Esther Perel, "You may be right, but are you wise?" This poignant question challenges us to reconsider our priorities during conflicts with our partners. Too often in relationships, the thrill of "winning" an argument can overshadow the deeper, more meaningful goals like understanding, connection, and mutual respect.

When we think of taking a break, we usually think of unhealthy couples going back and forth not being able to commit or stay broken up. However, that does not have to be the case! There are many benefits of taking a break, as long as you and your partner are aligned with the goals and expectations of the break.

Many relationships fail because of the lack of intimacy in a relationship. The most detrimental thing you can do in a relationship is to become roommates and strangers. It's easy for life to get in the way and the relationship to take a back seat. As a relationship therapist at Authentic Connections Therapy and Wellness, I have seen this happen time and time again.

Research studies show time and time again that healthy relationships are a key factor in overall life happiness. So, what makes for happy healthy relationships? There is a lot of bad information out there of what this type of relationship looks like. Social media and romcoms would have us believe that strong chemistry and a great couple selfie in Greece is the recipe for a lifetime of happiness. While these may be #coupelgoals they are not the most important aspects of a relationship.